I was just thinking . . .

Artistic perspectives - grief's tools of choice . . .

2009-05-03T17:46:00.000-07:00

To my friend Becky (@ weepyseeds),
Your words are beautiful; like strokes from an artists brush on canvas, each choice of words fits with purpose and depth.
I enjoy reading your stories and I would like you to know that I appreciate your choice of words. I was just thinking….We aren’t so different after all. It could be possible that we are similar in the way we convey our inner most private thoughts. Perhaps I choose the angles of my subjects in my photos for the same reason you choose your words to describe your subjects in your stories. Through our perspectives, you in your eloquent ‘choice’ of words and me through my 'odd' angles I think we strive to achieve the same goal... The objective of a grieving mother is a nurturing objective; to provide, to protect and to prepare all those that cross our paths. Hence, if a person just skims the surface of your stories or my photos, a person might see the subject (like that play on words?) as a whole, but if someone truly thirsts and stops to absorb not just observe, then perhaps that someone’s thirst may be quenched and thus we have provided. And maybe, just maybe since we can no longer provide for our daughters any longer in the way we are accustom to, maybe providing for others, even strangers, is our new means of providing for our girls.

just thinking,
Nicki

I love you Alicia Nicole Rix.

2005 3 Cheerleaders banquet

2009-03-12T12:37:00.001-07:00

I came across this photo and thought I'd share it.

Here are Nanny, Papa, Amanda and Remi at the banquet in 2005.

Here is a photo of flowers we put down at the intersection at Hwy 5 and 89 known to most as Angels Crossing. This is the exact place the car came to rest and it is exactly where one of the intersections light posts are located today. (That is Tracy Evans helping us put up the girls photos).

Check out my other blogspot

2009-01-11T20:29:00.000-08:00

http://photosbynicki.blogspot.com/

- thanks, Nicki

_____________________________________________

"The Shack" William P. Young

2008-12-29T19:49:00.000-08:00

Rick and I just finished the book "The Shack" by William P. Young. OMGosh!

I am not one for reading material dealing with death or sadness or anything like that, mostly because I usually can't see through the tears to make out the words while I’m reading. And also, I believe deep down I probably think, why read about it when I have to live with it every day? Anyway, Becky recommended the book and she and Mallory were talking about it one day and then someone sent it to Rick and I in the mail so I thought I'd give it a look. I read a couple of the first pages and didn't feel it was so great so I put it back on the shelf with all the others sad books that I haven't read yet.

Well, Sunday Rick and I were going to be on the road for several hours headed to Atlanta and I thought this would be a good time to listen to an audio version of the book. Since Becky liked it so much, I thought it must be worth a second look. WOW!!! I was surprised.

I like this man's thinking. It was as if he reached into my mind/heart/soul, plucked out my thoughts and put them into words. I mean, I have been struggling with my anger with God, respectfully of course, but still anger none the less and this guy dealt with all those feelings. I must say I was surprisingly shocked and pleased with it. Of course I cried and cried but they were good tears.

I would recommend this book to anyone. If you have read it, I'd like to know what you thought about it.

Wish I'd read this book a year ago. Might have helped with a lot of . . . stuff.

Remi loving on Nanny and Papa's cat

2008-11-04T07:14:00.001-08:00

Look at the expression in Rem's eyes. Now that is love.

Chaos Outloud: Favorite Foto(s) Friday 03/21/2008

2008-07-09T09:58:00.000-07:00

Chaos Outloud: Favorite Foto(s) Friday 03/21/2008

I was just thinking . . .: a difficult stage . . .

2008-07-09T09:56:00.000-07:00

I was just thinking . . .: a difficult stage . . .

ugly picture of me!

2008-07-01T07:10:00.007-07:00

Is this what I really look like?

my map

2008-07-01T07:10:00.006-07:00

Alicia made fun of my mapping out our trip to DC but as you can see, she wanted to look at it while we were on the tram before we arrived at our destination.

Then again she may have just been messing with me in order to get a photo of me and my map so she could prove to her friends that I mapped out our whole trip to DC.
:)

Sneak attack camera

2008-07-01T07:10:00.005-07:00

I hid in Alicia's room and snapped a picture of her when she walked in the door.
Looks like I caught her concentrating.
After I surprised her she laughed. hehe

............sigh, i miss her.

When the kids went to FL

2008-07-01T07:10:00.004-07:00

MOM!!! Stop-uh!

2008-07-01T07:10:00.003-07:00

Photo day at SHHS

2008-07-01T07:10:00.002-07:00

An angel among us...

2008-07-01T07:10:00.001-07:00

In this photo you can see the outline of an angel's wings around the girls.

The truck Alicia wanted

2008-07-01T07:10:00.000-07:00

2008 Softball Tournament t-shirts

2008-06-23T09:33:00.000-07:00

What do y'all think about these colors?!

I think they will stand out and be very appealing to the kids.
Maybe we'll sell out again this year.

Poster for softball tournament

2008-06-18T07:44:00.001-07:00

2008-06-18T07:44:00.000-07:00

Remi tells on God and I move forward

2008-06-12T09:45:00.001-07:00

Out of the blue one day Remi told her Momma that she was mad at God.
When her mother asked her why she was mad at God, Remi replied:

"Because he took Alex and Alicia to Heaven and
they can't stay here and play with me."

Amanda (Remi's Mommy), not certain how to respond to her daughter's
statement, could only come up with one word: "Ok."

Bless Amanda's heart, when she called me and told me what Remi said
and asked me for my advice, I too was caught with my mouth open. So
Amanda and I talked about different religions and the meanings of various
religious terms dealing with death. I answered her questions to the best
of my ability.

Having struggled with my own anger with God as an adult, I was quite
surprised that a 3 year old would be crossing this same bridge at the same
time I was. As a matter of fact, I found it sad and troubling that
this poor little girl was forced to deal with death so soon.
Here I am 40+ years old and just now dealing with death and grief.
I can't imagine a 3 year old (now 4) forced to rationalize DEATH, GOD,
and WHY?, all out in her own little mind (and heart and soul).

But obviously, Remi had thought these things through and she concluded
that she wasn't getting her fair share from God.

Apparently she felt God wasn't playing by the rules and that it was within
her rights to tell on him.

That it was 'ok' to tell on God.

That God was cheating and being selfish. I can imagine just such a conversation
that a 3 year old might haveas they try to reason things out in their own minds:

"Why doesn't God have to share?"

"I get time-out when I don't share with others."

"I'll be mad at God until he plays fair."

Still, it is comforting to know that Remi has such a firmbelief in the very existence
of God, that she can be angry with him.

I mean to her GOD is a FACT.
God is there and there isn't a question of "Do I believe in God?"
but the simple fact that God isn’t playing fair.

It took me several months after Alicia’s death to come to a similar
conclusion of my own:

You can’t accuse someone or something of cheating if you don’t
believe in their very existence.

It is my experience, that people don’t typically point a finger at someone they
don’t think exists.

I was angry with God but I felt one wasn't allowed to be angry with God
because that was a sure-fire way of getting a first class ticket to Hell.

I even began to ask myself, "Is there a God?"Finally, after a lot of rationalizing
with my own self, and trust mea minute (60 seconds) of time within ones own
mind trying to reason with one’s own self can seem like an eternity,
but eventually I came to a conclusion I could live with:

I couldn't be angry with something I didn't believe in.

And I certainly had enough anger within me to materialize a couple
of Gods, if that was what it took.

It was comforting to know, to realize, that I do believe in God.
That after a lifetime of ideas and what I considered ‘firm’ beliefs,
I truly did/do believe in God.

(sigh), at least that was something,
a solid foundation,
a rock I could stand on.

And now that I am standing again
and I know there is a firm rock under my feet,
I have something to stomp around on, a place to express my anger.

And so, ..........

I stand,
I stomp,
I shout,
I point my finger,
I express,
I believe,
I love,
I anticipate the answers.

............. 'with the heart of a child.'

I move forward,

on to the next matter:

PRAYER

Edna Bell Howerton

2008-05-14T14:55:00.001-07:00

Happy Birthday on May 9th.

I love you, Grandma!

Alicia's Christmas Lamp & a purse I made in November 23, 2003 photos

2008-03-31T20:04:00.000-07:00

This is a lamp I made for Alicia Christmas in
2003. I worked so hard on it and was very
proud of how it turned out.
It is still in her room today with the light shining.

______________________________________________

This is a purse I made to sell at Nanny's purse
party. Alicia was so upset that I sold it.
She just knew she was going to keep it.
I wished I had kept it for her but I sold it to
buy her one of the Christmas present she wanted.

Pics I took of Blake August 15, 2004

2008-03-31T19:51:00.001-07:00

Blakers, Alicia would have been so very proud of you in these photos.

I could hear her say, "That's MY Blake".

Nicki and Blake August 11, 2004

2008-03-31T19:17:00.000-07:00

This is my baby boy!

Softball practice March 23, 2002

2008-03-31T18:46:00.000-07:00

Swing that bat Alicia!

funny cats!

2008-03-27T11:08:00.000-07:00

I think cats are the funniest thing God put on the face of the earth!

Hope you like these as much as I did.

Easter 2008 Judy's and Tracy's pics

2008-03-26T15:01:00.000-07:00

LACI LU-LU

TRACY & LACI

AMANDA & REMI

REM ROCKER

HOLLY & SHAYLA

a difficult stage . . .

2008-03-26T08:29:00.000-07:00

5 stages of GRIEF:

1. DENIAL

2. ANGER

3. BARGAINING

4. DEPRESSION

5. ACCEPTANCE

ACCEPTANCE, being perhaps the most difficult stage for me to grasp.

I have come to realize that no matter how deep I go into this grief hole, the world moves on and I will still have to face everything whenever I choose to step out. But just peeking out of this hole now and then these past 4 years has frightened me and even angered me.

Angered, because Life keeps going on without her and I have had absolutely no control over any of the choices Life has thrown my way.

Frightened, I guess because of the Fear of the 'unknown'.

Anyway, I am trying to put what is left back together (as best I can) of me and my world and what I think my Life should be now. that is now without her as a living part of it.

Everything has changed about me; it all has different meanings;
Mom
Wife
Past
Present
Future
Dreams
Foundation
Beliefs
even my understanding of my own Faith. What is Faith?

I've got to rethink everything and that is something I've just not been willing to come to grasp, or maybe to accept? There is that word again.

40 some odd years of thinking the world works one way and having to start all over from scratch because I have found it isn't that way, is a very difficult thing to face.

Being forced to play the game of Life knowing that I may never know the Rules isn't very motivating. - Again, what is Faith? OK, so that is where Faith comes in, right?

I don’t know, I’m guessing now.

I’m guessing at EVERYTHING now.

I used to have such a handle on my understanding of Life and how things work or at least how I thought God wanted them to work.

Good things happen to good people. That is not true.

OK then God tests us with challenges in our Lives to make us better people or Christians or something.

No, I don’t think that is not true either.

I used to tell Alicia; "No where in the Bible does it say that Life is fair nor that it will be easy. It only says that God promises to be there."

Where?
Where is he?
Where is God?
What was I saying?
Why do I still think that?
I know he IS but I don’t feel his arms around me.
I see wonderful people doing wonderful works, good Christian people
but
I also see bad people getting by with bad things.
Why?
Why does God let these things happen?

Somehow something of my Faith continues on.

How?
How can that be?
How can I have such Faith in God without understanding what Faith is?
How can such strong Faith can be embedded so deeply in my soul?
How did I come to have such strong Faith at such a young age?
What life changing revolutionary thought process occurred when I was 9 years old to embed such Faith?
Where is that now?
I need that, thing to awaken me now so that I can face the challenges I foresee in my future.

ACCEPTANCE and Faith,

two very …. difficult …. 'properties'.

another visit from Alicia

2008-02-29T09:27:00.000-08:00

Another sweet dream of Alicia. This time she showed me her graduation invitations. The invitations had gold foil embossed red roses on them as well as a photo I took of one of the Angels at her place of rest.

...............
Alicia,

If you are looking over my shoulder as I type this, know that

I LOVE YOU!

Alicia and I went shopping...

2008-02-27T08:56:00.001-08:00

I was just thinking.....

I believe Alicia visits me in my dreams.

This week has been a week of weeping and deep sadness brought to the surface. I miss Alicia so much and some days the sorrow is overwhelming and the hole in my heart is not only bottomless but all encompassing....

Monday night I seemed to be at the bottom of the "black hole" in my heart, or so this is what I call it. Anyway, at one point I felt Alicia was there with me, in our living room trying to comfort me but unable to do so she chose to visit me in my dreams that night.

She came to me and asked me,
"What would you like to do while I am here with you, Mom?"
I told her I wanted to go shopping with her.
So we went shopping. (Something I miss very much)
Then she asked me,
"What would you like to do next before I have to leave?"
and I replied, "I want to lay in the grass with you and look up at the sky."
So we did.
We laid on the deep green, thick grass together and I played with her hair.
The next thing I know it was time for her to go but as she started to step out of sight,
I yelled "Hey, what about my hug?!"
and she came back and hugged me then stepped through an invisible door and disappeared.

They say we will know each other in Heaven and that Heaven is a place where dreams come true, that a person can go anywhere and do anything they want to, right?

If you can go anywhere, then why not visit those who love you on Earth?

With God ANYTHING is possible and what little girl wouldn't want to visit her Mom and go shopping with her?

If this isn't the truth then I don't want to know the truth.

just thinking,
Nicki

This song reminds me of Alicia

2008-02-27T08:56:00.000-08:00

Jesus, I Heard You Had a Big House

Jesus, I heard you had a big house,
Where I could have a room of my own.
Jesus, I heard you had a big yard,
Big enough to let a kid roam.

I heard you had clothes in your closet,
Just the right size that I wear,
And Jesus, I heard if I give you my heart,
Then You would let me go there.

Jesus, I heard about meal time,
..when all your children come to eat,
I heard you had a great big table
Where every kid can have his own seat.

Jesus, they said that there'd be plenty
..of good things in heaven to share,
And Jesus, I'd just like to tell you
I sure would love to go there.

Jesus, I heard in your big house
there's plenty of love to go around.
I heard there's always singing and laughter
..to fill the place with happy sounds.

And I've been thinking that a friend
who would give me all that he's got
before I even have met Him...
Well, He sure must love me a lot.

And Jesus, I'd just like to tell you,
I sure do love you a lot!

Alicia on American Idol?

2008-02-22T08:37:00.000-08:00

When I first saw Alaina on American Idol, my heart leaped,
and instantly I wondered if she really looked like Alicia
or is it wishful thinking. What do you think?

Dear God,

2008-02-14T11:19:00.000-08:00

Thank you for not taking my little boy from me too.
I would not have been able to live through that again.

your humble servant,
nicki

What is Blakers up to today?

2008-02-14T10:54:00.002-08:00

Blakers is delivering singing telegrams at school. heheheheheheeee

cute little thing.

He dressed up in his black tux today and was part of a quartet that delivered sweetheart songs to girls at school today.

Too cute. Look at those little bitty ears.
Ain't he sooooo cute?!

Alicia would have LOVED it.

Little man once gave me a telegram that said,
"I love my Mom cause she makes my heart happy".

....sigh, brings tears to my eyes.

Yep, and he makes my heart happy too.

I love you, little man.

A valentine for my little Misses Mornin'

2008-02-14T10:54:00.001-08:00

I hope you like your valentine, sweet-face.
We will come visit you this weekend to bring it to you.
It's been a long time since I visited your place but it is so hard baby girl.
...........I know you understand.

Valentines Day

2008-02-14T10:54:00.000-08:00

Alicia's Angel Feb 2008

2008-02-05T15:29:00.000-08:00

hard day....

2008-02-05T13:53:00.000-08:00

OK, Hard day.

just thinking.....

if you convert my name and Alicia's name into numbers you can come up with this equation. It leads to me minus her.

nickiannrix 6+4-2+5-4+2-6+6-7+4-9 = 4
alicianicolerix 2+5-4+2-4+2-6+4-2+6-5+3-7+4-9 = 4

or

nickiannrix 6-4+2-5+4-2+6-6+7-4+9 = - 4
alicianicolerix 2-5+4-2+4-2+6-4+2-6+5-3+7-4+9 = - 4

(sad)

February is a very hard month....

2008-02-05T10:13:00.000-08:00

ALICIA, ~ HARD DAY, SWEETHEART ~

I have such a hard time with the month of February.
I know you loved Valentines Day.
I remember your last one so well.

I think if it snows this year on Valentines Day, I will go to the Country Club and slide down the hill you all had so much fun on that day. I wish someone would purchase that stupid bit of land and make it The Kids Snow Hill or something like that.
I wish it could be blocked off so no one could build anything on it
and it would be accessible to everyone
and available for anyone who wanted to be there and slide down it.
Like a monument in honor of kids having good clean honest fun together.
A place they could go and sit on the grass and talk.

a . . . . . . ‘Free Zone’

That would be perfect. A place where a kid could laugh or cry and feel better.

God, I miss you sweetface. I miss you SOOOOOOOOOOO much.
I need you right now. …….. badly.
So much going on right now.
So many things I don’t have any control over.
So many FINAL things.
Too many things I’m not ready for.

We got you another beautiful Angel for your place. I am afraid of it getting broken or stolen but sometimes when that happens I try to turn it around and think of it as them taking a piece of you with them. As if you are going with someone on another great adventure.

Or

if I get there and find another Angel smashed, I try to think perhaps there was a big gust of wind carrying seeds from beautiful happy pink or yellow flowers
and perhaps the happy seeds brush up against the Angel and . . .
well anyway, I try to think of something like that instead of something ugly.
I try to consider that the person who does the smashing or scratching is
a sad person,
a hurt person.
after all they are there because they lossed someone too.
(sigh)

I am so sorry I haven't been able to come by
and visit your place.
...... it is so hard to do, sweetface
..... so hard to imagine you behind that marble wall,
so close and yet....
I can't get to you and hold you and protect you.
Your little body.
The body God gave me to raise and protect.
I promised to raise you in his name . . . and now...........

GOD, WHY?!

Why did you take her so soon.

Without warning.

I would have done ANYTHING, GOD!

Anything you asked me to do. ............

............... (sigh) anything

anything

just thinking.... wishing.......... begging........pleading,
nicki

I love this song!

2008-02-01T06:14:00.000-08:00

Artist: Jackson Alan
Song: Monday Morning Church
Album: What I Do

You left your Bible on the dresser
So I put it in the drawer'
Cause I can't seem to talk to God
without yelling anymore
And when I sit at your piano
I can almost hear those hymns
The keys are just collecting dust
But I can't close the lid

*You left my heart as empty
as a Monday morning church
It used to be so full of faith
and now it only hurts
And I can hear the devil whisper
"Things are only getting worse"
You left my heart as empty
as a Monday morning church

The preacher came by Sunday
said he missed me at the service
He told me Jesus loves me
but I'm not sure I deserve it
'Cause the faithful man that you loved
is nowhere to be found
Since they took all that he believed
and laid it in the ground

*And left my heart as empty
as a Monday morning church
It used to be so full of faith
and now it only hurts
And I can hear the devil whisper
"Things are only getting worse"
You left my heart as empty
as a Monday morning church

I still believe in Heaven
and I'm sure you've made it there
But as for me without your love, girl
I don't have a prayer

*You left my heart as empty
as a Monday morning church
It used to be so full of faith
and now it only hurts
And I can hear the devil whisper
"Things are only getting worse"
You left my heart as empty
as a Monday morning church

You left your Bible on the dresser
so I put it in the drawer

just thinking...
Nicki

My Angel, Alicia Rix

2008-01-18T06:45:00.000-08:00

If I had known I held an Angel in my arms each night,
I would have rocked a little slower and sang until day light.

I would have powdered her butt so gently with my most expensive cloth,
and stayed up all night rocking her without a second thought.

I would have taken every turn feeding her thru the night,
and soaked up every smell of her with all my strength and might.

If I had known an Angel had crawled across our floor,
I would have gotten on my knees and watched her crawl some more.

If I had known an Angel's tooth waited for the fairy,
I would have left all the money her little hands could carry.

I would have knelt beside her bed as she said her little prayers,
and listen to her talk to Jesus just like he was there.

I would have looked a little harder and watched her make believe,
as she talked to no other and poured her friend some tea.

Her lunch would been packed with love notes and fun stuff everyday,
instead of peanut butter and jelly and "got to go or I'll be late".

If I had known I saw an Angel kick a soccer ball,
I would have gone to every game and watched her play them all.

If I had known an Angel's tears fell upon my skin,
I would have found a silver locket to keep them safely in.

If I had known an Angel was planning to go fishing,
I would have packed my pole to go instead I'm left here wishing.

Love, Mom

We became friends . . .

2008-01-15T14:40:00.000-08:00

I remember one time when Alicia told me she wasn't pretty. I was so shock to hear her say that and hurt to know she felt that way. So I marched her in to her bathroom and stood her in front of her mirror. I stood behind her and looked into her eyes in the mirror and rested my chin on her shoulder and said,

“Alicia, look at yourself. Look at this beautiful young lady in the mirror looking back at you. You are the most beautiful thing I have EVER seen and I'm not just saying that because I'm your mother, I'm saying it because it is true. People pay money to look like you. Expecting mothers pray that their daughters are born looking like you. You are so lucky, Alicia because you are not only beautiful on the outside but you are beautiful on the inside too ..." then I turned her around to face me and I cupped her sweet, sweet round face in the palms of my hands, I looked deep in to her eyes, took a deep breath and said, "and that, sweet-face, is a very, very unique gift. So don’t ever think that you aren't beautiful, because you ARE."

I told her how proud I was of her because she was such a good Christian person and that I loved her not only because she was my daughter, all mothers love their daughters, but I loved her for HER, who SHE was, who she had become.

I also remember telling her that I wish I could literally open up my chest and show her
my heart and my soul so that she could actually see what she meant to me, that she was . . .
my life,
my breath,
my reason to live,
my morning,
my . . . everything. . . .

I am so very thankful I had that conversation with her that day because I think that was when we became closer than ever.

That was when I became .... her friend.

I think there is always a point in a mother daughter relationship when they become friends, and that was ours.

..... sigh, i really, really miss her.

just thinking (and crying),
Nicki

Alicia's roses

2008-01-11T20:02:00.005-08:00

All of the pink roses in my blog are Alicia's roses. Some from her birthdays, some from her graduation, and some from anniversary dates of her death.

........................... I really miss her.

I hope you have enjoyed my photos.

2008-01-11T20:02:00.004-08:00

I enjoy taking pictures of people and various objects from different perspectives. Most of the plants in my blog are simple weeds from on an empty lot across from my office during one of my lunch break walks. These three photos were taken one day during lunch while I stopped to smell the roses.

Brick path

Chains at work

Weed on vacant lot

more of my work

2008-01-11T20:02:00.003-08:00

frost on leaves

Art by GOD,

morning frost

single yellow flower on Allmon Farm in KY

one of my favorites

2008-01-11T20:02:00.002-08:00

more of my work 2

2008-01-11T20:02:00.001-08:00

purple flowers in vacant lot

Dew on leaves in vacant lot

weeds blowing on vacant lot

some more of my photography

2008-01-11T20:02:00.000-08:00

Leaf from parking lot

Wild flowers from parking lot

Allmon Farm in KY

Alicia's Roses

Alyson

2008-01-11T14:09:00.000-08:00

Jo and Qwenton, this photo is for you.

Hope it looks ok.

Broken dreams left scattered in my soul . . .

2008-01-11T13:24:00.002-08:00

A hole dark and deep,
filled with strength of the weak.
What lies in the shadows of a broken dream?...
What could have been, what was, . . . no more, so it seems.

A void vast and without sun,
full of hopes and dreams undone.
What lies in the shadows of a broken dream?...
What could have been, what was, . . . no more, so it seems.

Darkness embraced
flooded with memories of a face.
What lies in the shadows of a broken dream?...
What could have been, what was, . . . no more, so it seems.

Pain crippling body and mind
gorged selfishly on what was left behind.
What lies in the shadows of a broken dream?...
What could have been, what was, . . . no more, so it seems.

Sorrow overflowing
spilled upon the earth.
What lies in the shadows of a broken dream?...
What could have been, what was, . . . no more, so it seems.

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Random thoses.

A hole full of darkness, emptiness full of sadness, a void full of those things you can't quite wrap your arms around yet we are told that you are supposed to embrace the contents of this hole. You are supposed to appreciate this hole and all its parts for what it is. It is believed (so I've come to know) that you can not move forward without looking upon the things that fill the depth of its bowels.
Things a person never dreams of facing.
Things some never come to face in their life time yet others this very thing encompasses others.

just thinking,
Nicki

pics

2008-01-11T12:05:00.005-08:00

I put several photos on here after many requests. I hope you all like them.

just thinking,
Nicki

Blake's Senior pictures

2008-01-11T12:05:00.004-08:00

Blake's Senior pictures

2008-01-11T12:05:00.003-08:00

My Angel

2008-01-11T12:05:00.002-08:00

Kyra

2008-01-11T12:05:00.001-08:00

Kyra

Judy and Holly

2008-01-11T12:05:00.000-08:00

Holly and her Mom, Judy

Holly at the Old Mill

Holly and Judy

Holly at Lakewood Village

2008-01-11T11:36:00.001-08:00

I had so much fun taking Holly's senior pictures.

just thinking,

Nicki

2008-01-11T11:36:00.000-08:00

Here are some more photos I took at Christmas of Laci.

just thinking,

Nicki

2008-01-11T11:17:00.000-08:00

I've been thinking about doing photography for a long time. I mean as a business, getting paid for it. It is just strange to me, getting paid for something I love so much. Anyway, here are a few of the things I've done...

just thinking,

Nicki

Some of my work

2008-01-11T10:57:00.000-08:00

This is some of my work. I've been thinking about photography as a

business but I'm not certain I am good enough.

I mean I don't want to let anyone down.

Pictures I took of Remington at the Old Mill.

Remington looking down at the water.

Blake looking into his sister's eyes.
Where are you Alicia?

Blake...

Queen Anne's Lace